Pictured right: Sal & I stormin’ the streets of Georgetown like dunces (Sally’s most used piece of dope lingo)
There is nothing more becoming in a man than the use of absurd amounts of bomb lingo. I think all of us gals can agree that gnarly, wind-burnt Colorado snow boarders may very well be the finest species to walk our planet. This is also true of the sun-soaked blonde babes known as Caliiiiiii surfers, bro. But just as important as their athletic build and luscious locks is their EXTREME vocab that even straight men adore.
How does such lingo add so much to one’s charm? It’s all in the technique of integrating such words into one’s dialect. One must be confident and articulate when using bomb lingo. One mustn’t hesitate before spitting a dope piece of language. This, my friends, is the key to the flawless mannerisms of America’s sweethearts. These guidelines, however, aren’t to be followed with use of not dope lingo.
It is my commitment to my dope readers to stay current with the dopeness, and I must do my part in bringing you a summary of what’s dope and not dope in the American English Slang Vocabulary of 2013.
These items are as new as the seedling of a Georgia peach and as sweeeet as a honey suckle, dude.
• Dank: I think we all remember hearing this adjective for the first time out of the usual context. I remember I was in New York (where everything happens first) deciding what kind of pizza I should order, and the heady waiter said, “Duuude, you should so get the buffalo chicken—suuuper dank.” There need be no questioning when one uses this word to discuss a food or beverage; it means that particular item is absolutely delicious. I knew right away that a slice of buffalo chicken pizza was exactly what I needed. From this word branches its successors, such as dankalicious, danknausity, dank drank, and the vault of good eats some know as the dank bank. Dank can also be used in noun form. Prime example of appropriate usage: “Let’s go see Will at the Kolache Kitchen and see if he’ll hook us up with some dank.”
• Heady: Used above in context, this adjective is derived from the well-known American jam band formed in prime time 1965: Grateful Dead. Like Widespread Panic and Phish, their fans became followers, and their followers became worshipers. Dubbed “Deadheads,” Grateful Dead worshipers would lay out tapestries on the grassy knolls and just vibe on those jams for ten hours under the influence of a variety of substances. Heady individuals shop at Head Shops and are part of an alternative culture that march to the beat of a different drum than the mainstream. This word’s context is so strong that it is often used to make fun of oneself or one another when necessary. “Bro, literally I was on our tapestry at P-Groove for so long it was like my body just totally meshed with it, bro, like suuuper trippy and suuuper heady show, man.”
• Vibe: This common English word was recently made dope. About time. Not only does it rollll off the tongue, it’s short and sweet and full of impact. Right now, the word vibe has an anthem that recently hit the streetz. Kendrick Lamar’s “B*%#$, Don’t Kill My Vibe” has sky-rocketed on the hip-hop charts with its chill beat, slow jam vibe topped with LOLable, yet relatable, lyrics. Thanks Kendrie, for the perfect timing, because we are all vibin’ off the word vibe.
• Church: Aside from being a place of worship, this word is a dope adjective recently introduced into my vocab by my father. Its synonyms are dope, cool, sweet, tight, legit, etc. and should basically be used as an interjection or descriptive word when discussing something exciting:
“Tigers just scored!” “Chuuuuuurch.”
Its dopeness can be attributed to the fact that God is dope, and also to its dope derivatives used in casual conversation when in agreement, “preach” and “amen.”
This lingo used to be dope, and now it is again.
• Worrrrrd: Originally used in the 1990’s, the word word got lost in translation when Y2K took over and everyone thought all the computers were going to explode and we were going to go back to the ice age, causing us to over-compensate and become as futuristic as possible (using heinous words in everyday conversation, such as über). Every generation can thank us homies of the ’90s who took it upon ourselves to revive the dope word word. Its use is widely acceptable in almost all scenarios. I’m stoked to be able to dopely overuse this word again. It can be used to answer yes or no questions:
“Ay are we gonna see This is the End tonight? I heard Michael Cera is outrageous…” “Worrrrd.”
It can also be used in general agreement or to express one’s vibing off of another. “I love you, bro.” “Word.”
One of my friends up here in Arlington loves the double usage, “Word, word.” This isn’t recommended for beginner word-users. I’d recommend integrating the word word into your every day lingo for at least a solid 3 weeks before doubling up. Don’ttttttt push the dope lingo or you are at a large risk of killing the vibe.
• Straight: Straight means in order, all right, or okay. This word is dope again, but only as an adjective: “Chill dude, it’s straight.” The adverb usage is now outdated, unless you want to sound like a complete chotch: “I’m straight killin’ it.” Like, don’t say that.
• Right On: MMMM, I LOVE THIS PHRASE. Brings me right back to the ’90s, brother. It’s kind of like “word,” only it’s more enthusiastic. It should be used with a higher pitch than one’s relaxed vokes.
“I’m on my way, stopping at AM Mart for booze”
“Right on.”
• Psyche or Sike: Totes used this one as a kid when I wanted to be a sassy little playground flirt, “Jonas, you’re such a cool guy!….SIKE.” It basically completely takes back or negates what you previously state. Sike is the grown up way of saying “on opposite day.” “Dude, let’s just post-up in Middleton all night for our final tomorrow….SIKE I’m going to Penny Pitchers.”
Don’t Stop Believing in These Terms
• Dude: I don’t care what anyone says, dude will always be dope. It’s wayyy too chill to ever die out. It has a vivacious ring and is a standard American expression. The best thing about this word is that everyone is a dude. Kel Mitchell of Kenan and Kel, All That, and Good Burger spits the truth in the song “We’re All Dudes” where it is stated that I am a dude, he is a dude, and she, as well, is a dude. Because, hey, we’re all dudes. Alt. spelling (not always appropo): dood.
• Whatever: Seaux much history in this rich and meaningful word. This is another phrase I picked up from my father, except that this one happened to be my first word. It is current with the times to abbreve this word to “whatevs.” I could go on and on about all of the meanings and uses associated with this word, but whatever.
• Sup: Originally used on AOL Instant Messenger as a shortcut for “Hey, what are you doing?” sup is now just another way of saying “hey,” “hi,” or the more formal “hello.” Sup has been through a wavering of acceptance over the years, but let’s face it, there’s just nooooo need to hate on sup. ‘Tis been through many more metamorphoses than a caterpillar to get to its current state: “Hey, what are you doing?” became “Hey, what’s up?,” which then became “What’s up?,” morphing into the outdated “Wassup,” landing us at the shortest possible word (aka abbreve) of “sup.” Sup USED TO be answered with “nothing much, you?” Please stop answering sup as if it is a question. Literally just say sup back.
• Chill: Chill is a relaxed vibe. You can’t drink an RB&V (Red Bull and vodka) and be chill. You can tell someone to chill, or you can just be chill. Either/or, it’s all chill. Usages in context: “Chill on me, bruh!” “Let’s go chill at the house.” “That dude is ridiculously chill.” “Penny pitchers is chill; Wine night is buck.”
Immediately Cease the Usage!
• The Bomb: You are going to legitimately get tackled by airport security if you are still allowing this to be a part of your vocab, because “the bomb” now means a literal explosive device. Dropping this lingo couldn’t be done at a more convenient time, because “bomb” without the “the” is quite acceptable and encouraged as an adjective. Farthest thing from dope: “Your grandma is the bomb” Wiggity wiggity wiggity WHACK. Quite dope indeed: “Your grandma is bomb” Yes she is, my friend, she also makes bomb bread pudding.
• Shut the Front Door: If you hear someone seriously say this, slap him or her across the face metaphorically with a meannnnnn side-glance. Soccer moms thought this was a cool phrase to say to each other when gossiping, circa 2011, instead of their teenagers’ new risqué expression “STFU (acronymmed for content).” Shut the Front Door was never and will never be dope. CRINGE CITY to even type that wretched phrase.
• Hip: Not gonna lie, it’s actually pretty dope to hear your 80-year-old grandpa use this word in a sentence to describe his own Velcro shoes. It’s like “yes, grandpa, you look very hip in your new beige kicks, I do agree.” The irony is that this word’s definition on dictionary.com is “1. familiar with or informed about the latest ideas, styles, developments, etc. 2. Considered aware or attuned to what is expected, especially with a casual or knowing air; cool” —yet the word itself could not be more foreign from these descriptions. Lessoned learned: only use hip if you are wearing readers while using a magnifying glass to read this blog.—Adrienne Connelly
By Martha Gibbs
There’s something about the bracelet craze, which is actually not a craze any longer since it has been a trend that will probably end soon, but I cannot stop layering, adding, or obsessing. If bracelets had to be placed in a column on the Dope/Not dope list, they would be highly qualified for the number one DOOOOPEST accessory. One bracelet just simply cannot scream how much you actually rock what you wear; six barely does! As a standard rule of thumb, I try to average it to no less than seven multicolor bracelets, plus a watch, while switching from wrist to wrist to accentuate whichever dope bangle coordinates to the respective category of the silver/gold domain. My gold arm is usually my right, and the left is usually silver—but no strict rule there. Dope is dope.
I cannot answer what would be “too much” to wear, but the whole “less is more” mantra does not apply here whatsoever. MORE IS DOPE. As long as your arm can perform the necessary tasks expected of an arm, keeeeeep the bracelets coming.
The great part about the bracelet as an accessory is that there is no worry of becoming a foamer with the trend and overly accessorizing (like piercing ears or other body parts) because a bracelet is just that; a nonpermanent accessory. There is NO reason to not load up on the wrists up to your elbows, because there is just no way this trend will last much longer.
So while it’s in full force, so are my wrists. Here’s to seeing this DOPE accessory multiply and cohabitate; we need some new bracelet species running around to join our already large brood.
Thanks to the not just Weekly Dope but the DAILY DOPE girl herself, Adrienne Connelly, for letting me express through writing everything multiple bracelets mean to me. Keep rocking this blog and rocking the wrists!
Pictured above: My dear friend Goomby Gibbs stacked to the elbows with her dog Doopy.
By Martha Gibbs
