Showdown with the ex!
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Breaking up is hard to do.
For the Tiger faithful, getting even has proved just as difficult. Near the end of the 2004 season, with his voice grave and his eyes dodging TV cameras and automatic flashes, our man Nick told us in so many words, “It’s not you, it’s me.”
And he did it on Christmas.
Here was a guy who we’d gone all the way with just a year earlier. He was “the one.” We were so happy together. But the ice was cracking. Nick began to look restless, like he wanted something that, no matter how hard we tried, we would never be able to give him.
Why wasn’t our love enough?
And by the way, we were the ones who were supposed to break up with him! Mike, Curley and Gerry—we showed those scrubs the door, and didn’t look back. But this was different. This one really hurt.
“At least he left us for the professionals,” we told ourselves repeatedly to soften the blow. As if the NFL was another planet, and we would forever retain exclusive terrestrial bragging rights to our man Nick. Oddly enough, we found ourselves keeping close tabs on the Miami Dolphins and taking notice of turquoise and orange a lot more often. We even pulled ourselves together and attracted a new guy, a Midwestern boy named Les.
And Les is great. But that doesn’t mean we stopped thinking about Nick all together.
Just when we quit comparing Les to Nick and had swallowed his decision to leave us for the big time, he goes and takes up with another university. (He promised us that wasn’t what he wanted!) And not just anyone, either. Out of all the schools in all the conferences in the country, he had to fall for that annoying elephant-obsessed chick from Tuscaloosa, a crimson-wearing bugbear we, of course, run into constantly. Sure she’s rich, but come on! If he thinks she can make him happy, he’s wrong!
Oh, Nick told people this summer that dumping us for the Dolphins was a mistake, but he has never really suffered for that mistake, not enough to match the suffering in our once-broken hearts, anyway.
That all changes Nov. 3 when we will see Nick for the first time in almost three years.
This is more than a football game, more than going for the touchdown and running up the score. This is finally our chance to show Nick that he needs us more than we need him, and to look him in the eye and ask him proudly, with grace and affirmation, “What were you thinking?!?”
We don’t just want to “Beat Bama” this year. We want the network cameras to zoom in on the regret on Nick’s face as the clock ticks down. We want to TiVo his remorse in high-def.
That’s pretty much where we stand now.
It feels pointless to act so jilted, doesn’t it? Well, yes and no.
With a talented Tiger team and our man Les in charge, getting even can feel like a whole lot of fun, too.
Click here to read Lee Feinswog's story, Mr. Intense versus Mr. Nice.
Sideline takes: Ex players, coach chime in:
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