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Question: How is Kleinpeter deciding which ice cream flavors to make?

Answer: Samples and votes!

Surely you’ve heard by now that Kleinpeter Farms Dairy is enticing its cows to make even more milk for ice cream. They’re putting sweaters on them, feeding them waffle cones and inviting penguins to the farm to educate them on the wonders of freezing cold temperatures. Not really, but that would be cute.

By December, six flavors of half-gallon-sized Kleinpeter ice cream will be ready for taste buds. You can vote on flavors and other preferences at kleinpeterdairy.com.

Meanwhile, folks at Kleinpeter are enduring oh-so-painful taste tests. Stacked in the freezer next to employees’ Lean Cuisines, the samples come in fairly nondescript white containers marked with flavor and fat percentage information.

Tasters look at body (texture), fat (butterfat affects aftertaste), and overrun (how much air gets pumped into the ice cream). And President Jeff Kleinpeter takes notes—more chocolate, too sweet, and so on.

More than 20 testers have been brought in so far, but more will be needed. “The day you stop asking your customers what they want is the day you start numbering your days,” Kleinpeter says.

Distribution will start within 150 miles of Baton Rouge. But Kleinpeter is not opposed to out-of-this-world endeavors.

“Maybe we can send it to outer space,” he says. “I hope we don’t have to deliver it, though. We’ll let the aliens deliver it. Make them wear cow costumes.”

Thanks to the man with a moo ring tone, Jeff Kleinpeter, and fellow tasters Melinda Walsh and Marsanne Goldsby for the inside scoop.