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People say change is a good thing. Those people are clearly not from Baton Rouge. We are a city that likes tradition and wants things to stay the way they are. Fleur-de-lis, for example. Those tiny little juice glasses are essentially worthless when eating pizza, but I bet upsizing would lead to a riot of unseen proportions.

I will admit being notorious for bucking change. When I do find something I like, my world is usually turned upside down by having it ripped away from me. To all of you people that insist on messing with stuff, quit. To give you an idea of what should just be left alone, here's a list of things that I am still bitter about losing.

The original location of Coffee Call. I can't begin to list the memories I have from the quaint little spot behind what is now IHOP on College. Although the recipes haven't changed, the new location just isn't the same. I am convinced that the beignet-loving voodoo practitioners are on my side by cursing the Wal-Mart that took over the spot. This is the only explanation for the negative experiences I’ve had at that particular store.

Muffaletta's. This was a small family owned restaurant on South Foster that served the best tamales I've ever had. On LSU game days, we would buy huge paper bags full and eat them at my grandparents’ house with the entire family. It was our last local lunch before we moved away for three years. Of course, when I returned, it was closed.

Oculus Gallery. In the city of trite Louisiana-themed art, Oculus stood out as one of the best contemporary and slightly avant-garde galleries. The work shown was never boring, and the space was clean and bright, doubling as the owners' studio. Now I am left with only a few good contemporary spots to feed my art obsession. A girl needs options.

CC's muffin caps. I was up and around early one morning and decided to go inside CC's (instead of the usual drive-thru). There I found the most ingenius thing ever to come out of a Seinfeld episode: the muffin cap. CC’s caps obviously were created separate from the muffin (eliminating the question of what to do with the stump). It was light and fluffy with a delicate streusel topping. One morning when ordering my usual grandé iced mocha and blueberry muffin cap, I was dealt an awful blow: they abruptly stopped selling this delightful little goodness sent from heaven. I think I may have yelled at the poor barista through the speaker.

Drag queen bingo. I personally never had the opportunity to take part in this, but I had planned on it and would love to do it now. Unfortunately, it was cancelled due to low turnout. Wouldn't you much rather fight about a bingo card with a naggy queen over a blue-haired bitty? At least I wouldn't feel guilty about taking someone's Social Security money.

Hot roast beef poboys from Spanky's. My mother and I briefly worked together and used to get this most fabulous lunch across the street from our office. It was always warm, loaded with roast, oozing provolone and dripping with brown gravy. And not that au-jus broth mess that doesn't really stick to anything, but REAL brown gravy. The bun was soft and fresh and they were served with chips. Then one day I called prepared to place my to-go order, and was greeted with, “We don't do food anymore.” Click.

If any of you have the power to bring these things back, let's get started. I'm all for making changes to better our city, but stop the insanity before I lose all the things I love. I may drop dead of a heart attack if my Kleinpeter French onion dip is ever removed from the shelves. C'mon people, at least start consulting me when these changes have to be made so I can either prepare myself or protest. I'll be at home getting the signs ready.